C1: Fixation

C1: Fixation

Calling you beautiful is an understatement

Looking at your face (against the glimmering sun) spreading its rays to take more beauty from the world

Looking at your (shimmering) eyes giving it back

Sometimes sucking it all in and the rays in them become brighter, fiercer

Sucking me in

As I am left to feel or not feel at all the lightness of existence

(I woke up to an image in my mind that that inspired this image. It was of S looking at me through the corner of his right eye, as the falling sun and the ocean behind made it sparkle. We were standing on the pier arguing. Obviously, I embellished a bit to allow the moment its glory that can only be found in poetry, fiction, and our imaginative minds when we recall what could have been and make it more.)

my love, E.E. Cummings

animal-wallpaper-with-a-group-flying-doves.jpgmy love
thy hair is one kingdom
the king whereof is darkness
thy forehead is a flight of flowers
thy head is a quick forest
filled with sleeping birds
thy breasts are swarms of white bees
upon the bough of thy body
thy body to me is April
in those armpits is the approach of spring
thy thighs are white horses yoked to a chariot
of kings
they are the striking of a good minstrel
between them is always a pleasant song
my love
thy head is a casket
of the cool jewel of thy mind
the hair of thy head is one warrior
innocent of defeat
thy hair upon thy shoulders is an army
with victory and with trumpets
thy legs are the trees of dreaming
whose fruit is the very eatage of forgetfulness
thy lips are satraps in scarlet
in whose kiss is the combinings of kings
thy wrists
are holy
which are the keepers of the keys of thy blood
thy feet upon thy ankles are flowers in vases
of silver
in thy beauty is the dilemma of flutes
thy eyes are the betrayal
of bells comprehended through incense.

Admonitions To A Special Person – Anne Sexton

country-meadow

Watch out for power,
for its avalanche can bury you,
snow, snow, snow, smothering your mountain.

Watch out for hate,
it can open its mouth and you’ll fling yourself out
to eat off your leg, an instant leper.

Watch out for friends,
because when you betray them,
as you will,
they will bury their heads in the toilet
and flush themselves away.

Watch out for intellect,
because it knows so much it knows nothing
and leaves you hanging upside down,
mouthing knowledge as your heart
falls out of your mouth.

Watch out for games, the actor’s part,
the speech planned, known, given,
for they will give you away
and you will stand like a naked little boy,
pissing on your own child-bed.

Watch out for love
(unless it is true,
and every part of you says yes including the toes) ,
it will wrap you up like a mummy,
and your scream won’t be heard
and none of your running will end.

Love? Be it man. Be it woman.
It must be a wave you want to glide in on,
give your body to it, give your laugh to it,
give, when the gravelly sand takes you,
your tears to the land. To love another is something
like prayer and can’t be planned, you just fall
into its arms because your belief undoes your disbelief.

Special person,
if I were you I’d pay no attention
to admonitions from me,
made somewhat out of your words
and somewhat out of mine.
A collaboration.
I do not believe a word I have said,
except some, except I think of you like a young tree
with pasted-on leaves and know you’ll root
and the real green thing will come.

Let go. Let go.
Oh special person,
possible leaves,
this typewriter likes you on the way to them,
but wants to break crystal glasses
in celebration,
for you,
when the dark crust is thrown off
and you float all around
like a happened balloon.

Anne Sexton

A Happy Monologue About Unrequited Love

fault-in-our-stars-posterI love you. And I know that you don’t love me back. And that’s okay because I can’t make you love me. But, I am here with you and there is nobody or nowhere else I’d rather be. I may look back at this and feel stupid, but If I didn’t say what I am saying then I’ll live wondering what could’ve been… You were my first kiss, and I want you to be my last kiss. Your presence changes the molecules in my body in this weird way, that I have never felt with anyone before. It’s been five years since our first kiss and I have dated and kissed many boys; they made me happy and they made me sad… But then, I forget them. But you… You stay with me, even when you’re not present. You make all the sappy poetry and all those stupid love songs make sense. I can never imagine myself saying those ridiculous things to anyone but you. In fact, I want to say them to you. I want to stare deeply into your eyes and just lay there next to you forever. You make me go tinder; you were my sweetest kiss. I know this sounds really scary to you, but don’t worry, I’ll never pressure you or force myself into your life. I just wanted to say those things out loud to you and see what It feels like. It will probably hurt tomorrow and it may hurt for a while. But, I won’t regret it because you made me taste what love is and what’s it’s like to completely lose yourself in someone, and act like an idiot, and say idiotic things and it’s sweet and beautiful and dangerous and scary but, it makes me feel happy and free. And one day, I know I’ll share that with someone who will love me back and it will be sweet and beautiful too. So Whatever happens tomorrow, we’ve had today… Life is too short and I don’t wanna waste any passing moment without kissing you if I could. So come here and kiss me…”

– Unknown

“I’ll put your poison in my veins
They say the best love is insane”