C1: Fixation

C1: Fixation

Calling you beautiful is an understatement

Looking at your face (against the glimmering sun) spreading its rays to take more beauty from the world

Looking at your (shimmering) eyes giving it back

Sometimes sucking it all in and the rays in them become brighter, fiercer

Sucking me in

As I am left to feel or not feel at all the lightness of existence

(I woke up to an image in my mind that that inspired this image. It was of S looking at me through the corner of his right eye, as the falling sun and the ocean behind made it sparkle. We were standing on the pier arguing. Obviously, I embellished a bit to allow the moment its glory that can only be found in poetry, fiction, and our imaginative minds when we recall what could have been and make it more.)

The Perks of Having Noisy, ROWDY, & Obnoxious Neighbours

Dear Wonderful Reader,

(I have sHITTYpecial neighbors and I am trying to find the silver lining.)

1. You forcibly become an early riser. As the early hours of dawn are the only hours that allow you to indulge in the peace and quiet.
2. You forcibly become social and productive. As you hungrily welcome any chance to get out of your room whether with friends or to run errands.
3. You forcibly become attuned to new music, artists, and the 560,984,324 tracks of White Noise that exist on Spotify. As the only way to cope sometimes is to mask the noise.
4. You forcibly become articulate and scholarly. As you make full use of the Podcast application on your phone and all the free audiobooks on Youtube.
5. You forcibly become a creative thinker. As you think of creative solutions to solve the problem: whether to drill a “Quiet Please” sign to the side of your house, or to strategically move your desk by the window so you are always aggressively-passively making eye contact with them (in hopes that this will yield some shame–yet to be tested).
6. You forcibly become patriotic and shout God Bless America and kiss the flag. As you now understand what a privilege it is to live in a country where law enforcement will answer to noise complaints (also, you have finally understood the point of paying taxes).
7. You forcibly become conscious of your temperament and are forced to get a perspective. As you now have to develop coping mechanisms to be able to talk to yourself and calm it down when rage strikes.
8. You forcibly become acutely aware of what you require in your next residency (and relationship). As you now dearly uphold “No talkers/ No children” banner whether in a neighbor or a partner.
9. You forcibly become grateful. As you now savor peace and quiet and the little things in life that you have always took for granted.
10. You forcibly become more Christian and understand the complexities of the Bible. As you run to Jesus in prayer when all else fails. You now know the weight and depth of “Love thy neighbor” (Mark 12:31) as this command takes on new meanings in your life.

Rules of Happiness: Spend Out

Dear Wonderful Reader,

In her book “The Happiness Project”, Gretchen Rubin advises her readers to “Spend Out”. When I first read the header of the chapter, I thought she will talk about money and how we should spend more money in order to be happy.

Thankfully, her advise was much more accessible, and simpler than that. Ms. Rubin is advising against hoarding (guilty!!) or basically saving our “good” bra for only when we’re going out somewhere fancy. Or in my case marking my fancy perfume as a “special occasions ” perfume. How many of us are guilty of saving our “nice” things to events where we see fit, which may never come. Why not just enjoy them now  and put them to work and get our money and hard work’s worth. At the end of the day, they’re just things and they’re irreplaceable. Emotionally, it makes a lot of sense to suck as much happiness from what we got now rather than assigning them to a future they may never see (lol). Economically, it makes even more sense because you’re using all your resources (which may go bad or out of style if you keep hoarding).

So SPEND OUT and don’t hoard things. Wear red lipstick even if you’re only going grocery shopping. Break out the fine China for a simple event (or none at all). Wear your sexy bra even if you’re only running errands. Adore Me is encouraging women to wear their “good” bras AT ALL TIMES, check out their Instagram page for more inspiration. And I HIGHLY RECOMMEND “The Happiness Project”.

And yes, that’s a dog’s bed in the photo.

Huge Macy’s $10 Fall/Winter Clothes Haul

Dear Wonderful Reader,

I was inclined to make a huge purchase from Macy’s website because I saw that a lot of great pieces of clothing was marked more or less in the $10 range, all of which are Winter clothes which are usually pretty pricey due to their thick material. Please go ahead and take advantage of this sale if you need to.

Now on to the clothes. Since I bought those online I expected that a few of them will be “hits” and most will be “misses”. I experimented with different colors and sizes knowing that I am not going to keep everything and I’ll just return the “misses” to my local Macy’s which is conveniently located near my house. As long as I return them before I pay my credit card statement, I should be safe and happily enjoy the few bargain pieces I collected. I am very confused as to which pieces to keep. I modeled all the pieces for you to help me decide (and their different sizes/colors). The less number of pieces I keep, the happier my wallet is, so please refrain from saying “that everything looks great” and comments from this variety. I am also going to include my order’s invoice for price reference.

 

Pretty please, WHICH PIECES SHOULD I KEEP?

(If you scroll down you will see their names, should you need to point them out)

 

Invoice:

 

Shout out to my cousin Jackie for gifting with this beautiful grey tank top that I used as an under shirt in this shoot. Love you cuz ❤

 

 

Day 11: My 10 (14) Pet Peeves

1. Nail Clippings: Anything nail clippings’ related. When people clip their nails/toes with clippers that don’t have catchers and the clipping go flying across the room in a mysterious area and shall never be found except months later when you’re picking up that chip that just fell off, on the floor… I’m exaggerating of course but yes nails clippings.
2. When my dentist tries to carry a conversation with me while operating on me.
3. When family members drive my car or sit in the passenger side and leave change in the cup compartment. I’m not opposed to leaving change in cars cause you never know when you’re going to need it but I prefer to leave in a little drawer on the far left of the steering wheel.
4. When I worked really hard to organize (and categorize) an area and then people (my sister) borrow something and doesn’t put it back the proper way/where it belongs and just shoves it somewhere.
5. People who never apologize, even when they acknowledge that they’re wrong. I’m not being difficult but if you did something that you know is wrong towards me then just apologize and let’s move on. How else would I know that you’re aware that what you did was wrong and (hopefully) won’t do it again. Also, those who don’t say thank you.
6. When people lick their fingers in public after eating. Or when they lick all their 10 fingers instead of washing their hands…:(
7. When people crack weird joints in public, like their neck or back… (I don’t find it gross or anything but it makes squeamish). Also, when people mess with belly buttons (makes me squeamish as hell).
8. When people have a million icon/file on their computer’s desktop on random places and when their trash isn’t empty (computer recycle bin….why is it called “recycle” bin..?!)
9. When colleagues talk about how they went #2, or going to, or almost did (for people who are from outside The States, that means when people defecate). NO ONE needs to know this about you or is dying to find out.
10. Again about work/school, when colleagues or classmates bring lunch or food that makes the entire room stink.
11. Super over the top baby talk; the talk that breaks out when people are talking to babies, animals, or their significant other… Maybe I’m just a hater cause I’m not comfortable doing that but I find that annoying.
12. When people say “like” 79579497663838757959 times in a sentence.
13. When people on social media, especially the beauty community say dumb comments about make up/clothes like and are not exclusive to: “This is life”, “I’m living for this”, “This (insert materialist item) changed my life” *rolls eyes.
14. Last but not least, Its hard to explain but when girls are eating and after they’re done eating they put their tongue behind their upper lip then out and it produces a sound similar to a lip smack. Does that make sense….

Dearly beloved,

Dearly beloved,

If this love only exists in my dreams, don’t wake me up…

Justin Timberlake Says it Better

[Verse 1]
Said all I want from you is to see you tomorrow
And every tomorrow, maybe you’ll let me borrow your heart
And is it too much to ask for every Sunday
And while we’re at it, throw in every other day to start

I know people make promises all the time
Then they turn right around and break them
When someone cuts your heart open with a knife, and you’re bleeding
But I could be that guy to heal it over time
And I won’t stop until you believe it
‘Cause baby you’re worth it

[Chorus]
So don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me
‘Cause you might fuck around and find your dreams come true, with me
Spend all your time and your money just to find out that my love was free
So don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
It’s not a bad thing to fall in love with me, me

[Verse 2]
Now how about I’d be the last voice you hear tonight?
And every other night for the rest of the nights that there are
Every morning I just wanna see you staring back at me
‘Cause I know that’s a good place to start

I know people make promises all the time
Then they turn right around and break them
When someone cuts your heart open with a knife, and you’re bleeding
Don’t you know that I could be that guy to heal it over time
And I won’t stop until you believe it
‘Cause baby you’re worth it

[Chorus]
So don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me
‘Cause you might fuck around and find your dreams come true, with me
Spend all your time and your money just to find out that my love was free
So don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
It’s not a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
It’s not a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
Not such a bad thing to fall in love with me
(Not such a bad thing to fall in love with me)

No I won’t fill your mind
With broken promises and wasted time
And if you fall, you’ll always land right in these arms
These arms of mine

[Chorus]
Don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me
‘Cause you might fuck around and find your dreams come true, with me
Spend all your time and your money just to find out that my love was free
So don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
It’s not a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
Not such a bad thing to fall in love with me

Saying I Love You First…

“I love you!

I know that women aren’t supposed to say I love you first, but I am down to break all the rules here. I just wanted you to know that I love you… You’re probably freaked out, but I just can’t imagine saying that to anyone except you. And even though we may not be on the same page yet, I am not ashamed of how I feel about you. I don’t wanna fight my feelings for you, I wanna nurture them because they’re beautiful.  And don’t you worry about hurting me and all that BS, because I can take care of myself pretty well. (And why do you assume I’ll be the one getting hurt anyways?!) But, I choose to be here because I want to and I want YOU. I can easily divert my attention from this, live my life (like I was before), and have this with someone new. But, I just don’t see the point cause I already have this with you and I want you and (baby) you’re worth it.

Unless you wanna say goodbye, in which case I will accept your decision…

All I want from you is to see you… Let’s just hang out and see how it goes…just go with it and trust me, it won’t be so bad ;)!”

-Unknown

 

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

-Eleonor Roosevelt

 

Paris is Always a Good Idea!

“Bliss it was in that dawn to be alive. But to be young was very heaven.” -William Wordsworth

P.S. The screen shots are from “An Education”.

LIFE IS SO beautiful. So full of magic and possibilities.

Dear Wonderful Reader,

“LIFE IS SO beautiful. So full of magic and possibilities. When Billy died, I thought that my story had come to an end. But I was wrong.

Joe helped me to find something I had lost along the way.  Something I’d once believed so strongly: that the storms of life are bound to come, but maybe even in the storms, in the loneliest  times of all, you’re never really alone.

Love is the most powerful thing on Earth. I’ve seen what it can do. And it can do amazing things. Sometimes I imagine a world where everyone knows of a love that’s unconditional. And what a beautiful world it is.

I think Billy had it right, that there truly is enough love to go around. All you have to do is share it.

What is God’s love is like the sun constant and unchanging? What if you woke up one day and realized…nothing can take away?”

P.S. Watch this life-transforming movie as soon as you can. Also there is a book version!